As a follow-up to the great keyboard rant by Rob Manuel, here are a few suggestions rants to the keyboard manufacturers.

Visible logical layout

The Optimus keyboard should be the hottest thing since ... keyboards! There's no turning back now. Logitech, are you reading this?

Flexible physical layout

Don't like the size/shape of the Enter key? Then change it! Want a Solaris-style shortcut section to the left? Go ahead! Should be easy with projected or touch-screen keyboards, but could be a major pain when adding that springy feeling we're all so comfortable with.

Semi-wireless

Plug it in, and it changes transmission to USB while charging the internal batteries. Works as a dream for the iPod. Oh, I can dream, can't I?

Get rid of as many key combinations as possible

Most people without a university degree don't seem to catch up on CTRL-C, much less F2, until they've used the computer for years. Heck, even the IT consultant who used to have my current job right-clicked for any copy/paste operations! Give Joe / Jane Q Average a keyboard they can understand!

Oh, and leave us geeks the pipes, tildes and backticks.

Don't ever force F lock on boot

God dammit, Logitech. I will not install your shitty, proprietary software just to turn off that abomination for good! If I turn something off once, I want it to stay that way!

No multimedia keys

They make my keyboard clunkier and less user friendly. Especially putting the Sleep button next to Esc.

Volume dial, not buttons

The only keyboard I've seen with this was my old, trusty Acer. Piece of shit PC, but great keyboard. Just a small whirr, and the sound is full / null. And it just worked.